Chapter 22:  Worries

 

Lord Beckett was suspicious.  Not that this was entirely unusual—he was often suspicious of those around him.  One in his position had the right to be paranoid.  But Beckett was growing increasingly apprehensive about Robin and Admiral Norrington.  He could not explain why, for since the rather spiteful words Norrington had thrown at Robin when he had discovered whom her father was, the two had hardly spoken, and only then to give each other a cold but polite greeting as they walked by each other.

Beckett grinned.  It had been a stroke of genius to send a man who knew Robin’s parentage to fetch her.  What Beckett had not known was that Norrington would come to the conclusions that had caused him to completely break down.  The idea had worked even better than planned—Beckett had only been meaning to drive a small wedge between Robin and Norrington, and from there slowly force them apart if Robin did not do so quickly enough for Beckett’s taste.  But now that Norrington believed that Robin had done nothing but lie to him, Beckett had no reason to worry.

But he did worry.

Lord Beckett knew the value of information.  He had thought that he had all the information he needed to know about Robin in order to gain control over her.  Beckett did indeed know much more than Robin wished him to.  But while listening in on Robin and the Admiral, he had discovered something he had not known, though begun to suspect:  Robin and the Admiral had met before Beckett introduced them in Singapore.  And the nature of their previous relationship sounded as though it had been quite friendly…perhaps even romantic.

Beckett’s fists clenched at that thought.  Perhaps he had been naïve, but Beckett had believed that the relationship between Robin and the Admiral stemmed from the time they had likely spent together in Tortuga and onboard the Black Pearl, and that the relationship was mostly physical.  Beckett had also thought that any feelings besides sexual attraction were false, created by being allies and being bonded by the Blood Oath.  But now Lord Beckett feared that there was something more, something real that was somehow keeping the two together despite Beckett’s threats.

All evidence was to the contrary of this fear.  Norrington was now constantly depressed, often either sadly gazing at nothing or shooting a glare at Robin.  Robin also seemed very sad and appeared to actually feel a bit guilty.  Beckett had everyone on the ship keeping an eye on them, and the only reports that he received were of brief encounters where the two exchanged short greetings before heading off in their separate directions.  Yet Beckett still firmly believed that something was going on between the two of them.

One reason he believed that somehow the two were managing to continue their relationship was the fact that Robin still resisted Beckett’s touch.  She allowed an arm about her waist, but if Beckett’s hand began traveling lower, she would either slap his hand with her fan (if others were around) or strike him (if they were alone).  She tolerated kisses on her hand and cheek, but refused to let him even graze her lips.  This refusal of intimate contact made Beckett begin to believe that Robin was receiving physical pleasure from someone else—namely Admiral Norrington.

Beckett would watch the two closely at meals, to which he would still often invite the Admiral.  He often caught the two glancing at each other, but usually Norrington appeared angry and Robin appeared guilty.  Further showing his fear of the two continuing to have a relationship, Beckett had formed the habit of intermittently putting an ear to Robin’s door, listening for signs that she was not alone.  Sometimes he swore he heard hushed voices, but often Admiral Norrington would suddenly appear from above deck and head to his room, eyeing Beckett curiously as he passed.

Beckett kept telling himself that there was no need to be paranoid.  None of the Company’s soldiers or the crew of the Flying Dutchman had reported anything remotely suspicious at all, and Beckett himself also never saw anything to support his worries.  But he still feared that Robin was not completely his.

If Lord Beckett could have seen through Robin’s door, he would have known that this fear was warranted.  The evening that Norrington had confronted Robin about what he had heard from Bootstrap, Norrington had stayed with Robin through the entire night.  Upon waking up lying in bed next to her the next morning, he had felt a gnawing feeing in his stomach.  He was certain that Beckett would glare at him as soon as he appeared above deck, and that Norrington would die shortly afterwards in a fatal “accident.”  But no such accident occurred.

Though Norrington and Robin maintained the façade of sadness and anger towards each other around Beckett and the Company crew, they quickly became bolder in sneaking into each other’s rooms to spend time together.  Though they did not know it, they were spotted nearly every time—but the crew of the Flying Dutchman wished for them to continue to defy Lord Beckett, and even some of the Company soldiers sympathized and kept their mouths shut.

The crew was sure that the two were involved in an illicit love affair, but though the two would often fall asleep with Norrington’s arms wrapped around Robin and her head buried in his chest, nothing of that sort ever happened.  The two spent their time in each other’s beds talking quietly about their troubles and worries, confiding in each other.  Neither of them would bring up their past relationship, and neither expressed anything for the other beyond friendship.  Norrington did occasionally touch his lips to Robin’s forehead or gently caress her neck with his hand, but he never even attempted to kiss her on the lips.  He almost felt as though doing so would be betraying her trust in him.

The night before they were to reach Port Royal, the two were strangely silent.  Beckett was planning to announce the engagement almost upon their arrival in the port, and then marry merely a week later.  Robin had already expressed her worries over the marriage.  She feared that Beckett would not even allow her the small amount of freedom he had promised.  The night had also recently hosted the intensely awkward and rather brief conversation about the wedding night, something neither Robin nor Norrington wished to dwell on.

It was a particularly cold night.  Norrington had an arm around Robin, and her body was pressed close to his.  The two had not spoken for nearly an hour, but they were not asleep.  The silence gave Norrington’s mind time to wander back into the past, back to when he and Robin had been happy.  His mind found its way to the last time he had seen Robin as Jacqueline.

“Promise me you won’t be out after dark.”  Jacqueline looked at him innocently, but promised nothing.  “Jacqueline, it can be dangerous at night.”  He kissed her forehead.  “And I would never forgive myself if something happened to you.”

Jacqueline bit her lip.  “Fine.  As long as you promise not to go off and get killed by pirates.”

“Worried?”  Jacqueline did not look at him.  “I’ll be fine.  I promise.”

Their first kiss…

Norrington smiled sadly at the memory before his brow suddenly furrowed.  “As long as you promise not to go off and get killed by pirates.”  It was such a specific request of him—not to be safe, or to return, but to not be killed by a pirate.  And he had been killed by a pirate.  His mind now leapt forward in time.

“You died here,” Robin said quietly.  She turned to look at him.  “Didn’t you?”

“You knew,” he breathed suddenly.  Robin looked at him questioningly, surprised by the interruption of the silence.  “How could you have known where I died and by who’s hand?”  Robin looked away, hiding her face from him by burying her head in his chest.  “And how did you know before it happened?”

Robin shook her head.  “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

Norrington raised his hand and gently lifted Robin’s chin so she was looking at him.  “You told me not to go get killed by pirates,” he said quietly.  Robin moved her head away from Norrington’s hand and managed to hide her eyes from him again.  “You knew that I would die at sea by the hands of a pirate.”  She still refused to look at him.  “Jacqueline…”

Norrington froze, his eyes wide.  He could not take it back.  Robin slowly raised her eyes to look into his.  She gazed at him for a moment in silence.  “It was a feeling,” she whispered finally, reaching up and running a hand through Norrington’s wigless hair.  “I can’t explain it, James.”

Norrington smiled nervously, wondering if Robin was going to react to his use of the name Jacqueline.  “You understand if I find it difficult to believe you,” he said lightheartedly, although it was the truth.  “I believe that there is much more to you than meets the eye, Robin.”  Robin smiled softly.

“Jacqueline.”  Norrington first thought that he had imagined it.  “My name is Jacqueline.”

Norrington stroked her cheek.  “Jacqueline.”