If you're gonna be a dog, then at least be a good dog

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Back to See 'em off! Written on 15-Jan-2009 by DaveyWavey

This is Jeremy*. I hate him.

In fact, I hate him so much that I expelled him from my flat, leaving him to fend for himself. There he is, sitting outside my flat**, feeling sorry for himself.

However, after a while I noticed that he seemed to have made a friend:

Jeremy and friend

I don't know who his little friend is, or where he came from. We've not been introduced.

And of course, now it's getting silly. It's like a bloody squat party for silly inanimate*** objects out there. Just look:

jeremy3

Ridiculous. If they keep this up I'm going to have to ASBO their ass.

* OK, so I name all my plants Jeremy. What's your point?

** OK, so it's actually my old flat, which I moved out of 3 months ago. But I've been lazy about posting this.

*** OK, so a plant technically isn't inanimate. But you get my meaning. Jeez you're being pedantic today. Give it a rest, will you?

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Tags: friends,party,plant,abandoned,jeremy,forging a new life in the wilds of the 3rd-floor landing

Comments

written on 16-Jan-2009
chickerino says:
I had a similar plant. I also hated it. It leaked everywhere (probably my fault) and made a horrible stain on my nice wooden floor!
written on 16-Jan-2009
SianMeades says:
My friend Sam spent months growing me sunflowers - which I'm sure you'll agree is just about the nicest present ever.

After less than a week in my care, they died.

:-(
written on 16-Jan-2009
DaveyWavey says:
Yah. The problem with Jeremy (note the leak-proof pot) was that he insisted on growing everywhere. Even when I tried to punish him by not watering him for six months. There was some evil vegetative intelligence at work there, I'm sure.

You've reminded me that I have some sunflower seeds somewhere. Hmmm. Maybe a big yellow new Jeremy is needed.
written on 16-Jan-2009
SianMeades [http://www.sianyland.com] says:
Dave, after reading this line "Even when I tried to punish him by not watering him for six months." I don't think you are ready to have children.

Just a thought.
written on 16-Jan-2009
chickerino says:
Those bastards just don't die! When I didn't water mine it grew new roots from the trunk in a way that reminded me of that film Species with the really hot chick that had sex with those guys and then killed them all horribly with totally NOT hot tentacles that grew from her face!!!
written on 16-Jan-2009
DaveyWavey says:
Oh yeah. Jeremy had 'air roots' as well. Git.

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